Panda Publishes!

Hey cheese curls! It’s time to sit ‘round the holiday-scented tealights and hear about Panda’s progress in grad school! I know I haven’t updated in a while, and as I sat here waiting for some water to boil so I could pour it down the toilet bowl with dishwashing detergent in order to unclog it because I don’t have a plunger, I thought, “Why not update my blog!?”

Indeed, it has been a hectic few weeks that have passed. The last time I updated was about Labor Day weekend, so let’s start chronologically after that. The second week in September, I went WHITEWATER RAFTING! In Tennessee, no less. It was a great time and because I have a lucky panda life, I was the first one to fall in the rapids when we began. I am normally not an outdoorsy panda, but I have to admit I had a great time. About 50 students went, and almost all of them shared a cabin that evening. Although I love people, too many people at the same time in the middle of Tennessee with a toilet down the street is not really to my taste. So instead, I returned to Atlanta for an evening of festivities at various nightclubs in midtown, not the least of which included a casual coastal knock-off bar called “Flip Flops”. As the Germans would say, “GUTEN!”, but NOT REALLY.

Toilet clog update: I’m not really sure what happened last night, but I have been standing over the toilet for the past 10 minutes, pouring hot water down the bowl. I can’t believe I waited 15 minutes for the water to boil, when I could have just turned on the hot water tap. The first time I poured in the hot water, the steamy, soapy suds arising from the citrus detergent wafted into my nose. Then I realized I was breathing in poop soup, so I threw up my mouth a little bit and then continued pouring hot water down while holding my breath. Anyway, it’s still clogged.

But on to the update:

TOILET CLOG UPDATE: Okay, so after flushing another 10 times and not seeing any results and even breaking a plastic hanger but still too scared to stick it in the toilet, I finally went to CVS and broke down and bought a PLUNGER! When I got home, I barely plunged it twice and it was back to normal again! Yeesh. I guess you never appreciate things until you’ve been pouring hot water down your toilet.

So now it’s about an hour later. Any normal person around this hour would probably be relaxing, watching a little TV, maybe reading a little of the new issue of The Economist (yup, I got it! Great investment). UNFORTUNATELY, I am sitting alone in my apartment, drinking homemade iced tea that is lukewarm because I didn’t refrigerate it, working on homework but procrastinating and writing this blog instead, and thinking what it would be like to have my CELL PHONE BACK.

For alas, on the way to pick up The Boyf on Friday evening (along with his two friends, accompanied by Danto), my phone jiggled it’s jolly way out of my trendy jacket (it’s Kenneth Cole, OKERR) and right onto the MARTA subway’s train tracks. Even though I managed to salvage the battery, that is still one Nokia N97 that the world will never see again. Today I got a new SIM card from TMobile (free, surprisingly!) and am now deciding whether I should purchase a new cell phone through Craigslist, online, or through Tmobile/authorized dealer. I’m thinking Craigslist, but because I am a frugal panda, I have tried to bargain down EVERY offer, and unfortunately, no one seems to be very considerate about this issue. 

Lab work is going well. It’s a little slow, but that is good since my schedule is craz-o with four other classes and a seminar. I’ll have to admit I have been partying a good bit on the weekends, but soon it will be winter time and then I can’t not wear pants anymore, and you KNOW that the only reason I go out is to dress up like a ho panda. 

Dr. Titten is the visiting research scientist in our lab, who also happens to be an orthopaedic surgeon, who ALSO happens to live in my building and who ALSO happens to be Jewish and balding and super funny and AWESOME. Anyway, because he is my new best buddy, it makes me sad that THE BOYF HAS STOLEN HIM FROM ME! There is bromance, and then there is BULLDOGS BROMANCE. But don’t worry about me, I’m over it! I have a new best friend, and his name is MASS TRANSFER HOMEWORK. It ain’t no thang.

Because I tend to talk a lot (loudly) and because most people are not accustomed to the mannerisms of a panda, I have been EVICTED from my desk in the lab! Instead, I now sit at a desk in the far back corner of the lab, where 80% of the other people around me are from a DIFFERENT lab! It is actually not so bad because I can just be loud by myself (these things happen) and that way I won’t bother anyone. But STILL, really!? We are not riding the bus in first grade anymore, although I do have to admit I loved getting the seat on top of the tire (only the back one) because you could use the bump as a footrest. 

SO PANDA!

So in tribute to the fantastic people that I now have to leave because I sit at my own island in the lab (they might as well have put a Dunce cap on me), I made a fantastic video entitled…DORIS! 

ENJOY! 

OH EM GEE! And the most important thing that I almost forgot to say!...

I HAVE MY FIRST PUBLICATION!!!

Take THAT, NSF! And also the powers-that-be that moved me from my desk! I’m third author but it is in BIOMATERIALS! THE COOLEST JOURNAL EVER! 

Biomaterials is the coolest journal ever.

We are making final edits before it is available in print, but for now I will leave you with this newly published paper by Doctor Professor, whom I LOVE and can finally reveal his identity because we are best science buddies and IN A PAPER TOGETHER! This is entitled “The Goldilocks Surface” because he is a genius and can come up with cool theories and because he also used to own LLAMAS! But when my paper comes out, I will be sure to share it here as well. 

Enjoy again! I’m going to celebrate with another glass of lukewarm sweet tea!