Turkey Panda

Happy Thanksgiving, my dear little ones! Thanksgiving is the best holiday, because not only does it cross racial/social/gender/cultural/religious/etc. barriers, everyone gets to put on stretchy pants and eat turkey until they pass out from tryptophan overdose! Although our household opted to go out for dim sum in Chinatown, I still ate until I had minor constipation! Although the aforementioned effect may have also been caused by WAY too small pants from H&M that I have donned for the past three days in hopes that they would stretch out (or I would become slightly smaller). What is up with European sizing? Why can't we just have one size for everyone? I still propose a 3D scanner to automatically scan each person's body, then make the clothing specifically tailored to that body. The future is now!

In other news, I also got a chance to get some shopping in on Black Friday (PANDA FRIDAY!), for EIGHT HOURS. Yes, we were one of those families that went out on Thanksgiving Day (we are Chinese, for God's sake. There is no way we could pass up deals like that). Eight hours is certainly a lot, especially when it is from 10pm to 6am. Dancing in DA CLUH' (that is Panda speak for "the club) is way better than walking around under the fluorescent lights FROM HELL for so long. Obviously all this could be blamed on Cabbage's poor decision making skills, as well as her insatiable lust for material goods. WHAT HAS THE WORLD COME TO!? Even Little Mao was brought along on the trip, although he seemed to love being able to stay up all night. Panda here has still been trying to catch up on sleep lost by that godforsaken night in retail wasteland! It seemed that this year's political and financial circumstances have prompted Americans to stay at home, quivering into their turkey bosoms, filled with stuffing, too scared of the uncertainty associated with Obamacare to spend a little quality time cajoling at their local outlet mall. Nevertheless, apparently internet sales are up by 7%, with more to come on Cyber Monday!

Due to lab drama (happening all the time anyway) between our lab manager and Dr. Zebra, my meeting time has been scheduled for Monday morning at 6:30am. WHAT THE DONKEY!? Although early morning meetings are actually much appreciated to get them out of the way, I will have barely any time between Sunday evening when I arrive at home and Monday morning to prepare my meeting materials. I'd better get a good night's rest so I can get started ASAP tomorrow...

ACK! I know I promised to update twice this month, and technically I started this post before the end of November. But alack! 'Tis now the first of December! Which means I GET TO SHAVE!!!

Updates on the hair removal very soon...December shall be an advent month of many fantazmo posts! Stay tuned...