Goodbye, Facebook Panda

As promised (like I always keep my promises), I am updating before the month of February has even caroused its way in. Instead of being productive and working on my application for a travel fellowship, I have decided to catch up on recent celebrity gossip. I even read this recent shocking SPORTS news story, compliments of The Boyf, of some internet girlfriend death hoax of former Notre Dame linebacker Manti Te'o. When I start reading sports news, you know excrement has hit the fan.

In fact, approximately two weeks ago, I deactivated my Facebook account. Apparently the company also just came out with Graph Search, which is in pilot mode but seems futile at this point (perhaps it's me). Graph only searches through your friends or public profile information, which would also require people to update their profile with all of their interests and information. With the previously known onset of job interview slaughter through Facebook (myself included; remember that incident in undergrad with Dr. Professor?), most people have decided to use aliases instead of their real names for professional purposes. I also don't/didn't like to associate Facebook with my professional life, but after a while it seems inevitable that your coworker "adds" you as a friend and you would seem like a donkey-hole to reject. Although Facebook itself doesn't care what your name is because it just generates popular data from "the masses", I'm starting to get annoyed by the constant invasion of Facebook into EVERYTHING. "Vote for me," "Look I'm married now," "Look I'm skinny/fat/depressed/emo/hipster now," "Here's a photo of me looking drunk at a party even though I talked to no one the entire time because I was ON FACEBOOK on my cell phone and just snapped this photo before I left to preserve my online image." I realized that most successful and respectable (albeit usually older) people do not have Facebook, or at least keep it private enough so that you can't see them parading around in their underwear or asking for help with a survey all the time. Plus, I'm happy with where I am right now and the people I'm surrounded by, including The Boyf, so I don't really care about sharing that with other people. Let's be honest...are you REALLY happy about how happy I am? Because I'm only slightly excited when I see someone from high school get fat. TRUTH.

So you see I'm back.

And even though I had already started the deactivation process a while ago (permanently closing chat, stopped taking/uploading photos, checked maybe once a day, put up The Office of Misogamy poster...), I still feel so much...clearer...after cutting all ties with Facebook. It was easy to phase out of MySpace because Facebook was there, and now it's not hard phasing out of Facebook because I still have LinkedIn and EMAIL. The stupidest excuse I have heard of people who have Facebook is their "networking" abilities. Why not just use LinkedIn? And for your grandma, why don't you just send her an email with some photos of yourself, instead of broadcasting everything to her and the rest of the world? If she can use Facebook, she can probably check email. And she will feel special that you actually sent her the pictures instead of whoring yourself out to the internet. The only problem I really have without Facebook is that I can't access my photos. I suppose I could go and see if it's possible to download all my albums (it probably is, but I'm too lazy to do it now), but since Facebook is both good and evil, "deactivation" doesn't actually terminate your account - it just makes your account invisible to other people. You can still access your own account and retrieve your photos. For the future, though, I'll hopefully get to buy a nice camera and can just create a Tumblr account. Or, you know, just keep them on my computer and blog.

For a while (and probably even now), people were obsessed about creating an online profile of themselves that was separate from their "real" self. Now we've integrated with technology even more, but seem to have become even less integrated as human beings. Back in March, I participated as a student representative on a panel for Stay With It Facebook (ironically) Day of Engineering. EVERYONE (these are all executives and industry people) was tapping away on their phones. The only person that actually initiated some sort of communication with me was Mr. Charles Bolden, director of NASA. We had passed each other on the way to the bathroom; he was going out, and I was going in. All he did was smile at me, and I laughed because we had bumped into each other so clumsily. I had no idea who he even was at the time. And afterward (when I did know who he was), he gave me a hug and wished me good luck in school.

So here's my question: What the hell happened?

How are people so obsessed with themselves and their projected online image/profile...their "relationships" with people online, while in real life, I can't even have dinner with people without them "tagging" us at a restaurant or uploading a picture of the food online. I walk onto a bus or elevator or any other public space. Instead of what normal people would have done 10 years ago (saying HELLO), everyone is staring at their phone. I admit I'm a culprit of this, also. There have always been awkward times when I don't want to start a conversation and just randomly punch numbers into my phone, even though I have no one to talk to. But all this, I hypothesize, has been fostered by the increasing technology that is around us. It has made us feel uncomfortable to be ourselves, and to be around other people. I am and always will be a people person. I have to talk to someone IN PERSON to understand their emotions, laugh, learn, share ideas... Programs such as Google Drive have been immensely helpful in doing group work and working together online. But nothing (I hope) will ever replace what it's like to actually have a conversation with someone. I have been constantly disappointed by people who just aren't genuine at all. What's the point of building a relationship (online or off) with someone if you can't trust and rely on those people? I believe that I have great relationships with a small group of people here, and we hardly ever communicate using technology (phone sometimes to organize, but not talk).

Technology should be used to FACILITATE human communication and relationships, not replace it. Of course, The Boyf and I would have never been able to have a long distance relationship without cell phones. But we never really talked using email or chat. In fact, I'd prefer hand written letters over some public "I miss you". It's way more personal. I have two pen pals that I write regularly, and even though we correspond maybe every 3 weeks, it feels like for the past 6 years our friendship hasn't skipped a beat.

Anyway, enough of the rambling. Another exciting piece of information is that I have ventured into my first cell study of graduate school! Disgusting, I know. It's one of those things that was so common during my undergraduate research, but was "off limits" for a while in grad school since I had to perform a lot of materials characterization and optimization before the actual experiment. Ho hum. I hope to finish the experiment and get data this weekend (Happy MLK Day!), and hopefully have something to add to my poster for the Orthopaedic Research Society conference next weekend. Which is also my first conference in grad school! I've been learning a lot in lab thus far, and am excited to get started on some new things. For one, I'll be doing some hands on prototyping of scaffolds that I get to design and create myself (with the very much needed and appreciated help of a design instructor)!

Classes haven't been too terrible in terms of workload, but I do need to buckle down and get started on my proposal. Even though I've written the proposal itself (without the preliminary data), I need to go over it with my advisor because all these new projects I am working on at the moment will probably sneak themselves in at some point as well. Ah, GRAD SCHOOL! I won't bore you with details, except something exciting: apparently the Jack Daniels headquarters and tour is located 3.5 hours from me! And it's FREE (not the whiskey, just the tour...you sick poop). As soon as I get some headway on these new research projects (inshAllah), I am going to go!

If you read this and you believe that the end of Facebook is near (or not), comment below! Also, if you like alcohol (HELLO)!

Rude People Discriminate Against A Literate Panda

 The weather has finally cooled down, and it seems that the summer heat will no longer be baring its fangs for the remainder of the month here in Quarryville. However, heat wave continues in the south…just my luck!

Not sure if it was the Peking Polo logo or the menus that Padre placed at the local grocery store, but business yesterday and today was fantastic! I spent most of both days working at the restaurant, which was fine because it was actually busy. The worst is sitting at the restaurant on a hot day with nothing to do.

Reading for BLOCK 0 is finally complete (at least enough to answer all the review questions…I skipped over ~10 pages in the last chapter because there were no questions, so I should go back and review that content)! Now all I have to do is type up the answers to the review questions, which shouldn’t take that long seeing as I have already handwritten most of them down. Then I need to take the online end-of-chapter quizzes and go over some basic concepts again (re-memorize amino acids, other chemistry stuff). That needs to be done by Wednesday, when the pre-course starts. Then I have about two weeks to finish up the laboratory safety course online, which isn’t very hard, just tedious. THEN SCHOOL BEGINS! I’m already signed up to attend 8:10am lab group meetings every morning starting the 10^th of August…blech. And hopefully I’ll get to meet my co-advisor shortly thereafter.

Yesterday I tried printing out the Peking Polo picture in my last post. I went to the library and printed two black and white copies, and one color copy. The black and white ones came out, but not the color copy (which Hair wanted). So I had to ask the lady, and she told me to try again but make sure I set the printer on “color printer” so it would go to the right one. I had already done that, but I did it again and went back to the counter. There was nothing, so after a few seconds I asked again to make sure. The lady got impatient with me and said, “It does print in color IF YOU SET IT TO THE COLOR PRINTER SETTING.”

HRMPH! As if I, a college graduate and common library and computer lab frequenter, did not have the settings correct on the computer! I just said, “Oh, that’s not a problem. Don’t worry about it.” Then she had the audacity to JUSTIFY HERSELF and say, “I’m just really busy right now.”

PURELL?! (aka for real!? In Big K speak)

What a butthole. I know there was nothing wrong with the setup on my end – I bet it finally went through at the end of the day. I should have gone and printed 50 color pages so she got a taste of her own medicine…”it wouldn’t have printed if you weren’t so nasty to that panda!”. I’m still angry about it, but also really sad. I love the library…it’s such a shame that a great place like that can be tainted by menopausal holier-than-thou volunteers (maybe she was even paid…which would be worse!). So I’ve decided to order a photo 8x11” print from Costco instead. It’s only a dollar something and much better quality!

Last night Cabbage came home! We exchanged gifts, hers to me from Korea, and mine to her from India. She got me a traditional Chinese dress that is white with blue/teal embroidery. It is so pretty and fits me well, except for the top is kind of weird around the shoulders. And also she got me a crystal necklace, which is cute but I usually don’t wear much jewelry so I’m not sure when I’ll be able to sport it. I guess this just gives me an excuse to dress up more! I got her a hand-made jewelry box, two gold-plated bangles, tea and chai spice, and traditional kajal eyeliner. She took everything but the eyeliner, which was an enormous fail because I had entirely forgotten that she has her eyeliner tattooed on (PURELL).

Today Cabbage stayed home to recover from jet lag (tomorrow too, probably), so I had to work again. It’s okay, though, because I get to keep the tips (as little as they may be)! This morning I had a chance to reunite with Baby Eighties for a nostalgic breakfast at Jennie’s Diner, where the portions are huge and the customers…interesting. I wish I had more time to spend with some of my old friends, but now that everyone is “grown up” and busy all the time, I can only claim mealtimes.

 I also had two bags of clothes and shoes from my closet for donation. Baby Eighties is having a yard sale on Saturday, so I gave her my shoes to either keep or sell, and I donated the clothes to the Community Closet. There is a consignment shop (I didn’t actually know “consignment” was different than “used clothing” shop) closer to my house than the Community Closet (a local version of Goodwill), so I tried to donate my clothes there, instead. The lady said that the store didn’t take donations, so I was very confused and asked how they obtain their clothes. She pointed at a paper on the wall and told me to read it, like she couldn’t waste her breath or two minutes explaining to me what was going on, or maybe she was just testing to see if I, a panda, was literate. Either way, what a poopface (of COURSE I want to use stronger language, but just think about my future career as Dr. Panda)! Apparently you have to dry clean and iron your “fashionable” clothes (and on the paper it had examples of “fashion”, in case I was blind or dead) and then set up an appointment to sell your stuff. They pay you 50% of whatever your item sells for, after it sells. So I said, “thank you” and left.

But my question is, wouldn’t the shop make more money if it accepted donations (or mine, at least)? I mean, if they don’t think my clothes are “fashionable” enough, they could donate them to the Community Closet, right? And it’s their/her loss anyway. Because I had a dress with a new tag on it, other trendy dresses (“name brand” as the instruction sheet might have said) and shorts and things like that. So at least half of it would have been fine to sell, even for standards as (supposedly) high as theirs. Oh, and the store is called FASHION EXCHANGE. I’m sure it is fine to shop around in (I have window shopped there before , too), but if the owner is anything like that lady (or heaven forbid, IS that lady), then I would (like her) not waste my time. Just because I have nostalgic roots for the Quarryville library and can’t ban that, doesn’t mean that I won’t slander individual rude people all over the internet.

Now I feel better.

Tomorrow is yet another early morning (it looks they’ll all be early from now own, considering the 8:10am lab meetings M-F). Padre and I are going to Costco to get me a backpack, and then I’m crossing my fingers to go to Staples to get a 4gb flash drive for only $5.99 (I heard it on the radio tonight!). But more likely, we’ll go to the outlets and update the clearance inventory at Calvin Klein. Ah…it comes round circle again.

Panda Declares Danger

This will be short since I only got around four hours of sleep last night (more like this morning), and I need to wake up at 8am tomorrow to go shopping (for shopping, I’d declare myself an insomniac). I decided to slack off on the studying since I was working at the restaurant today and the lady who helps out doesn’t come in on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. So I looked over half of my amino acid notecards and took it easy.

BUT THEN…

Some jerk called and complained that the shrimp fried rice he ordered LAST NIGHT was the worst shrimp fried rice he had ever had in his life. When I offered to give him a new order for free, he said that he wouldn’t take it even if we were the LAST restaurant in the WORLD. 

I asked him if the shrimp was undercooked. It wasn’t.

Apparently he was expecting more vegetables and flavor (aka MSG, sodium, all that stuff that usually KILLS people). 

FIRST OF ALL, BUDDY – may I call you buddy? Or would you rather have me shove this egg roll up your…sorry, have to keep this “nice, clean fun”. But anyway, BUDDY – the shrimp fried rice has bean sprouts, onions, scallions and shrimp in it. Oh, and rice. It’s SHRIMP fried RICE. And just because other restaurants put frozen peas and carrots and some egg in their fried rice, doesn’t mean that our fried rice is terrible. We season the rice and precook it before it even hits the wok and the shrimp is added. What’s the whole deal with having the tastiest fried rice, anyway? Could it be worse than WHITE RICE? Because white rice tastes like NOTHING. And you ordered RICE. So I’m thinking it would taste like a variation of some sort. 

SECONDLY, BUDDO – If this rice was so terrible, as you say, and if you were a first and last customer, as you say, and if you don’t want a free fried rice, then WHY CALL!? Any sane person that visits a restaurant for the first time and doesn’t like the food would just keep his or her mouth shut and just not go back. Why did you feel the need to call in and let us know the fried rice was bad? It had nothing to do with the actual food. No one got sick. YOU just THINK it is BLAND.

THIRDLY, YOU BIG COWARD – Why don’t you man up and NOT put your number on private? The only thing I regret is not recording the phone conversation, because I was so gracious even when you insulted my family’s restaurant. It’s not that you don’t like the cook, you obviously have a problem with the entire way we prepare food (well, rice at least). And who are you to judge us by ONE meal? Sorry for taking your $3.85+tax and giving you rice that tastes like RICE. And after twenty years of being open, I MIGHT ASSUME that the way we make our rice would be suitable for the general population. I’ve been working in restaurants since I was in the womb. This is our family restaurant, and it may not be much, but don’t you dare come around insulting the food when IT WAS PERFECTLY FINE. 

I HATE YOU. And the worst part is, I have no idea who you are. So I’m just going to slander this around on the Internet in hopes that it might get back to you (you know who you are). And if we ever do meet, I will just warn you once now:

OKERRRR. My panda powers will completely overtake your puny mind. So don’t mess with me! 

Whew. I needed to get that out.

And not only that stupid creep, but a bunch of other emails popped up when I got home and reminded me that I have to do a POOP TON of work in the next few days, and I STILL DON’T have my schedule yet. I am still waiting to see if I was accepted into a program, which would entail traveling to a conference in early August. If I’m accepted, I go. If not, I am going to Hotlanta NOW. BUT I NEED TO KNOW. LIKE NOW. So I’m freaking out about my agenda, I’m freaking out about the impossible BLOCK 0 homework that I JUST started for the med school class, I’m freaking out because the school still needs my transcript and PROOF OF CITIZENSHIP (I already sent it, GET ORGANIZED, school!), I’m freaking out because I have to close my grandma’s bank and telephone accounts but she is not in the country and I ALWAYS HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF EVERYTHING even though no one will talk to me because I’m not authorized on their account (I HATE YOU QWEST, she has dementia for goodness sake), and I’m still hating on the anonymous hater of my beloved shrimp fried rice.

SO I WENT RUNNING.

It was pitiful.

I ran around the block once and almost went into cardiac arrest (JOKE, don’t worry it was only heart palpitations…JOKE), so that shows how much I’ve been working out lately (I HAVEN’T). But anyway, it felt so good to get that energy out. Otherwise you know I would have just cried and ate chocolates. Both of which aren’t really conducive to getting any further on the dreaded BLOCK 0. 

But after my run, I felt better. I’m glad there’s going to be a gym downstairs in my apartment complex. If things keep up this way, I’ll be ready to run a marathon by the end of the semester.